The reasons for the toughest decision

After living and working first in Philippines and then in Thailand for slightly more than six year, the day of reckoning fast approached. When we left India, we knew a day would come when we will have to make a decision most probably to return to India but it appeared as a distant day.

I was given the choice of continuing to work in Thailand but in local terms or else could return to India.

The work in Thailand was great, the school for shennu was great, the quality of life was great, still I was forced to make the painful decision after spending weeks of agonising days and nights to return to India. I know Shenuu hated this decision and am also very worried that it would be very difficult for him to settle in India.

The thoughts which shaped this decision:

1. We left India when Shennu was just 4 yr old. We then lived in Philippines and Thailand. Even if we decided to stay in Thailand on local terms, we didn't get the confidence that we could settle there totally and it was also given that shennu would have to do higher studies in EU or USA. In that case, I worried that he will not know a place as home and wouldn't be able to return to home even if he wanted in future. Hence, I though if we moved in India and even if we stay for few years, he would know it as a home, somewhere he could return if needed.

2. I also worried that he needed some continuity in studies and moving to India would possibly help him with that.

3. The job security in Thailand was suspect and I didn't have the confidence that I could get another job if I wanted in case any issues in my current company. In India, I thought I could get other jobs relatively easily.

4. In we move to India for few years then there could be opportunities for me to again get expat role. Once I was outside, I was at the mercy of the company and had to settle for anything that was offered.

5. We wouldn't have got much savings in Thailand if stayed on local terms. In India will have higher savings and hence, will have more financial security. In Thailand, I would have never felt the security which is needed to have sense of peace and happy healthy life.

6. I would have slim chance of a promotion but India there are lot more opprtunitues and hence my chance of getting it seemed higher.

7. We didnt have any friends in BKK. It was breaking my heart that shennu didnt have friends to play with during holidays. I hope that in our building in Mumbai, he will find friends to play with.

I understand Shennu doesn't understand this decision and is mad at me for making this decision. I have stated the logic behind this decision with the hope that someday in future, he would be able to see how difficult it was for me to make this decision and it was made keeping only his well being in mind. I thought of compromising few things for the long term good of all of us. I remain committed to find opportunities abroad and hoping that it is only short tenure that we need to have in Mumbai.

I pray that this decision works out for all of us.

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